her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
i think my cat just said my name.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Randomize