whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
