Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
How's work?
Spinning.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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