You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
