Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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