I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Randomize
