dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Duck Duck Cougar?
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
