69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Randomize
