Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
please don't ironically join a cult
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