Whod you bang
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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