my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
It's just like the Real World with babies
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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