Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
Randomize
