i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
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