Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
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