i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
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