Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
i would punch a child for taco bell
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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