Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
