Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Randomize
