u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
and you said cock pushups were impossible
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
