dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
party gras won. party gras always wins.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
I have tasted many bathrooms
Randomize
