new low.... made out with someone while peeing
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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