just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
