I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Randomize
