You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.