i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Randomize
