You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize