Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
MIDGETS
????
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Randomize
