Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
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I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
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I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
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