Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Randomize
