and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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