Texts From Last Night

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  (647): View more from Ontario

  I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum

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  (647): I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum http://tfl.nu/wnzc
  Replies (32) Good night (705) Bad night (3993)
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.

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  (803): so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal. http://tfl.nu/ov2w
  Replies (61) Good night (936) Bad night (6541)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion

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  (651): The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion http://tfl.nu/8885
  Replies (12) Good night (2240) Bad night (4187)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink

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  (210): I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink http://tfl.nu/9ici
  Replies (9) Good night (8109) Bad night (1270)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.

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  (813): We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again. http://tfl.nu/6j6o
  Replies (43) Good night (2493) Bad night (4973)
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  (315): View more from New York

  I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit

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  (315): I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit http://tfl.nu/ybzi
  Replies (7) Good night (3710) Bad night (1885)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.

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  (910): I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him. (910): Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer. http://tfl.nu/vb0s
  Replies (4) Good night (2148) Bad night (607)
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  (319): View more from Iowa

  Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?

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  (319): Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best? http://tfl.nu/g5yt
  Replies (15) Good night (3530) Bad night (678)
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  (802): View more from Vermont

  Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment

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  (802): Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment http://tfl.nu/k1ie
  Replies (5) Good night (1354) Bad night (375)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before

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  (615): I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before http://tfl.nu/iyr5
  Replies (0) Good night (569) Bad night (604)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now

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  (724): Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now http://tfl.nu/jdhz
  Replies (8) Good night (949) Bad night (551)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.

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  (614): You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning. http://tfl.nu/s4j6
  Replies (14) Good night (1488) Bad night (634)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.

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  (541): I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore. http://tfl.nu/w4vs
  Replies (5) Good night (291) Bad night (673)
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  (527): View more from

  I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.

  (1-527): View more from

  Top night. Top night.

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  (527): I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered. (1-527): Top night. Top night. http://tfl.nu/68t6
  Replies (1) Good night (419) Bad night (558)
• Favorite

  (347): View more from New York

  Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries

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  (347): Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries http://tfl.nu/429z
  Replies (3) Good night (941) Bad night (266)

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