You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
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I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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