I think I won the penis lottery.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
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