I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
