More tranny stories later!
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
