I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
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