does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
