wrigley field is MILF paradise
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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