Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Randomize
