Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
2020 sucks, I want a refund
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
