She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
