office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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