The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
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