we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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