i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
I had to cum in my sink.
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