Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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