She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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