I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
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