Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
im about as happy as oj after his trial
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
