IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
