I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
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